Top Ten Reasons to Have a HSP Dyad Partnership ~ (or a significant reciprocal relationship)

HSP Highlights & Insights                              November 2011
(Revised & republished February 2018)

Top Ten Reasons to Have a HSP Dyad Partnership© ~ or a significant reciprocal relationship ~  OR “Do you ever just long for something deeper? ”  
by Jacquelyn Strickland, LPC and Molly Sheahan

Note:   A “dyad” in this instance is defined as:  a pair; specifically, sociology : two individuals  maintaining a sociologically significant relationship.

With HSPs,  a “dyad” can easily be expanded to include two or more individuals in a sociologically significant relationship — as is so uniquely, and beautifully co-created at the HSP Gathering Retreats, and on many social media sights today.  This does not automatically imply a “friendship” so much as a moment in time when one is is allowed to see and be seen, to understand and be understood.

Here is another top ten list that  is  shared at the HSP Gathering Retreats.  Many of you have asked that it be printed in my newsletter … so, here it is ~ a gift to you ~ with  my sincerest wish that you also have a HSP friend or connection  in your life with whom you can share a part of  life’s journey with.

Two sensitive extroverts:
an HSP “moment in time” experiencing the sometimes rare gift of knowing and being known ~ without words.

1. The safety of the relationship provides us with a forum within which to fully “come out” and reveal ourselves as a highly sensitive person.

2. It provides us with validation and acknowledgment – allowing us to be seen, heard and understood.

3. It relieves pressure, tension and energy drain from not being authentically seen or heard in our daily lives.

4. It creates an avenue for fuller self-expression of our Spirit, including our emotions, imaginations, and perceptions, often leading us to wonderful (inner) places and (outer) possibilities never before revealed.

5. It provides us a place to share our vivid and often intense experiences of the world around us.

6. It focuses on our strengths, opens our heart and infuses us with a sacred innocence and joy.

7. It helps us move beyond blind faith to a feeling of “faith like prayers just heard.”

8. It can take the pressure off others, especially our non-HSP partners or friends, who may find it tiring to go the depths we naturally find energizing, nurturing and supportive.

9. It can keep us focused on what really matters and away from irrelevant details which can ultimately drain our energy.

10. It can provide us with a mirror which allows us to fully see, hear and feel our own energies which can then serve as validation and clarification for the depth of our perceptions.

If your cat loves your friend, you know it is a relationship built on trust and love.

This list comes from my personal experience and was co-created with my special HSP friend and  dyad partner, Molly, back in 2001.  Thank you Molly.

Some of you might remember meeting Molly at the 6th HSP Gathering Retreat near Sequoia National Park in the fall of 2004, and also  at the Colorado HSP Gathering Retreat in Colorado in the fall of 2007.

P.S. And did I say : 
 These same top ten reasons  are often experienced
at the HSP Gathering Retreats ! ”  

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Jacquelyn & Elaine (2009) Back when we were both much younger 🙂

The 2018 HSP Gathering Retreats™ , with Dr. Elaine Aron, my co-founder, always joins us either in person or via Skype or Zoom ~~   Unless something changes, Elaine will be joining us this year from the comfort of her own home.   There will be plenty of time to personally connect with her, ask questions, and hear her latest wisdom.

Barbara Allen-Williams, Jacquelyn & Annet DeZwart – my co-hosts in Sweden 2013, and Germany, 2015, and now again in June 2018. 🙂

The 34th HSP Gathering Retreat
14-18 June 2018    Dorset, England
with my returning, lovely, helpful, supportive co-hosts, Barbara Allen-Williams
http://www.hspsensitive.com/
and Annet DeZwart
http://www.highsensitivecoaching.com/ (

Oh wait…
..
. did you catch my description of Barbara and Annet ?  I think I just defined a “sociologically significant” relationship with another.)

 

The 35th HSP Gathering Retreat:
September 30 -October 4, 2018   Phoenicia, New York   

Register here:  http://www.lifeworkshelp.com/hspgathering.htm

 

 

 

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15 Responses to Top Ten Reasons to Have a HSP Dyad Partnership ~ (or a significant reciprocal relationship)

  1. Molly says:

    Awwwwwe That was beautiful! I love you. Thanks for being there for me. You radiant being you!

  2. Phyll says:

    Totally agree! As an HSP, I have a need to deeply connect, talk, be authentic, express, create, be heard, and seen. And, in our oft-hectic, chaotic world, it’s sometimes difficult if not impossible. Add in the current tenor of the political mish-mash, cultural “unfriendliness” and societal traffic jams (metaphorically speaking), where’s the comfort, security and happiness for us HSP’s? It’s challenging, to say the least!

    Love your idea of dyads! It’s important to connect with other HSP’s, folks who “get-it” and get you. Folks who can share and connect at more meaningful levels than superficial chit-chat. People you can grow to know and love–furry friends are essential, don’t get me wrong (and I have many pets) but it’s also essential to connect with Human Beings, too! Question is: how do I meet and connect with other HSP’s? If anyone reading this would like to chat with me, please get in touch. Thanks, Jacquelyn, great blog!

  3. Andrew DiLiddo says:

    Jacquelyn: Thanks for today’s email reminder. Winter is a tough time for me, I have SAD and use light therapy. Thankfully, the days are getting longer and I can see myself getting over the hump soon. As a male HSP, I do not have a dyad relationship, although, when I was very active in Al Anon I did have male sponsors that I regularly worked with. I do tend to isolate to protect myself and draw firm boundaries at this time of year because it seems my energy gets drained so easily. Simplistically, today’s email from you was a good reminder to take of me, which I have a bad habit of forgetting to do.

    • Jacquelyn says:

      Greetings Andrew, I hope Spring is finding its way to you, and I hope your HSP self-care has continued to nurture you.
      I think having an AlAnon sponsor would be very similar to having an HSP dyad partnership — in that the main goal is to
      know and be known, and to be seen and heard. This would include challenges, frustrations, joys or accomplishments. Not
      where you live? Might it be possible to attend one of the 2018 HSP Gathering Retreats ? One is in England, 14-18 June, the other
      in New York (think fall colors) Sept 30-Oct 4. Wishing you the best,

  4. Jacquelyn: Thanks for today’s email reminder. Winter is a tough time for me, I have SAD and use light therapy. Thankfully, the days are getting longer and I can see myself getting over the hump soon. As a male HSP, I do not have a dyad relationship right now, although, when I was very active in Al Anon I did have male sponsors that I regularly worked with daily at times and several times each week. I do tend to isolate to protect myself and draw firm boundaries at this time of year because it seems my energy gets drained so easily. Simplistically, today’s email from you was a good reminder to take of me, which I have a bad habit of forgetting to do.

    • Jacquelyn says:

      Hi Andrew, Glad to hear you were reminded of your own HSP Self Care ! Reaching out to just one other HSP can make such a
      difference … or even reconnecting with your past Al Anon sponsor — anyone that “gets” you .

  5. Evonne says:

    Thanks for your good tips in newsletter. HSP thing all new to me, even though have many of the traits, left undefined for too many years. Would like to share thoughts on this subject with someone who knows how all this feels.

  6. Janna says:

    I know I’m late to the game (I’m new here), but thank you for the newsletter as well as all of the comments. I’m still discovering my HSP self and trying to figure it all out. It’s overwhelming and lonely, but I see myself in all of you. The comfort of knowing that there are others out there who could understand me – and to know that I’m not strange or wrong for my feelings – it’s literally a life-saver. Thank you all for being so open and willing to share. I look forward to more! 🙂

  7. Naomi Crosby says:

    I’ve just come upon this. I see there was a gathering in the U.K. in June. Will there be another, in 2019? are the dates known? I plan my year carefully and can plan it in if I know.

    I have just read about HS extroverts. so exciting! thank you. I find the description of an HSE totally accurate: I get quite miserable if I forget that I need to be out and about, and this reminded me that I must get myself to some upcoming poetry festivals.

    • Jacquelyn says:

      Hello Naomi,
      So sorry that you missed the 34th HSP Gathering Retreat in Dorset, England. 🙁 There are no plans for an
      HSP Gathering Retreat in Europe in 2019, however, my friend and colleague Barbara Allen-Williams of the National
      Centre for High Sensitivity offers several HSP MeetUps around the U.K. There is also an HSP Meet Up in Cookham County
      run by another HSP who attended the Dorset retreat. Her name is Cindy Barnes. There are tentative plans for the 36th
      HSP Gathering in May here in the Pacific Northwest (USA.)
      So happy to hear you have found the HSE description helpful and accurate … A poetry festival sounds exactly like the
      kind of “novel” stimulation we sensitive extroverts would find nourishing! Thanks for checking in.

  8. Kim Serroul says:

    Good morning.
    Do you know of any specialist in ontario Canada. I live an hour east of Toronto.
    I can now identify myself after reading your article on Facebook as a HSE but do have many markers as an HSA. 50/50 ratio.
    I have been dating a guy for almost 3 years, on and off. Who I would identify as a HSA with a 70A/30E ratio. I am finding that he doesnt share my feelings on his past relatio ships involment still being part of his life.
    I was married for 33 years and niw seperated for 4. He was married for 18 years and has been living on his own except for the 2 years he lived with the girl that he left his wife for. ( I can hear what you are thinking while you read those last 2 sentences).
    I have been struggling with this issue and although he thinks of her as just a friend…she is a proven homewrecker and abuses his kindness as a future safety net. I dont trust her but I trust him. I would like to find out hoe to stop these ferlings that I will wslk into his house one day to find her makimg sure that she is still.making her presence known to him in any way she has to.
    Other than this issue we enjoy each others company…we laughed and havr common interests.
    If you have any advise or could recommend a collegue near me, I would greatly appreciate it as your article explains alot of what ive been stuggling with.
    thank you
    Kim

    • Jacquelyn says:

      Hello Kim…. Here is the person I know in Canada … I think she is not too far from Toronto … Dr. Jadzia Jagiellowicz
      highlysensitivesociety.com
      with best HSP wishes,
      Jacquelyn

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